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10 Ways to Overcome Shyness

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A major part of putting your best foot forward in the dating world involves throwing your personality into the spotlight. However, shyness can prevent you from showcasing the real “you.” Shyness when dating can be a long term struggle for many individuals, whatever your age or dating experience.

While overcoming shyness doesn’t happen overnight, our top 10 tips will help you break out of your shell and set you on the path to finding true love confidently.

1. Ask yourself “why”

Understanding why you are shy is a major step in overcoming your struggle and approaching life-changing scenarios with confidence and charisma.

Overcoming Shyness

2. Identify your triggers

Whether your triggers involve facing new situations, being thrust into the limelight or encountering individuals that you admire, training yourself to overcome these particular scenarios is an essential step in overcoming shyness.

Overcoming Shyness

3. Practice makes perfect

Conquering situations where you encounter shyness is all about practice. If you find meeting new people particularly stressful, for example, make an effort to push yourself out of your comfort zone by approaching others.

Overcoming Shyness

4. Mind over matter

As well as practicing with real life scenarios to overcome shyness, training your brain to adopt a confident mindset is also vital. Many shy individuals find concentrating on others a great way to minimize worry and maximize self-assurance.

Overcoming Shyness

5. It’s all about body language

Understanding how to use body language to your benefit can help you overcome shyness as well as portray yourself to others as a secure, confident individual. Stand tall in your battle against shyness and make a great impression every time.

Overcoming Shyness

 

6. Talk a good game

Talking to yourself in the mirror really does help. Practicing how to talk clearly is an excellent way for shy individuals to quash fears of embarrassment during conversation.

Overcoming Shyness

7. Never compare yourself to others

Forget measuring yourself against others – you are who you are.  And besides, even the most outgoing person grapples with their own self-doubt.

Overcoming Shyness

8. Take baby steps

Overcoming shyness doesn’t happen overnight. Take baby steps and put yourself out there steadily to conquer your fears for good.

Overcoming Shyness

9. A little help from your friends

Don’t be afraid to ask for help from friends and loved ones in your quest to overcome shyness. Having a wing man to introduce you to new people is a great way to get ahead.

Overcoming Shyness

10. Just do it

A good way to conquer your shyness and get closer to a more confident you is simply to jump into the deep end and ask questions later. You may just find that the sheer act of diving straight in will give you a huge confidence boost.

Overcoming shyness

This post was supported by eHarmony. The experts at eHarmony are here to help shy singletons everywhere to get the guidance they need to take on the dating world with gusto. eHarmony can match you with singles who are compatible with you, which means you’re more likely to feel comfortable and confident with your match from the start.

 

Are you shy? If so, what are some ways you overcome shyness?

Posted on: Jan 20, 2014

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27 comments
Date Impaired
Date Impaired

In my work life I am not shy at all, however, in a social setting I am shy and never know what to say to people I don't know.  I am not very good at chit chat. Plus I am in the 50+ age group and men don't even seem interested in talking with me. How does a 50+ woman find men interested in dating a 50+ woman?

Kermit Alexander King
Kermit Alexander King

Maybe I need to work on being shy...or acting shy sometimes(?)...lol!!! Just kidding. But I was on a double-date with a close friend and his partner once and my friend would later tell me that he felt the upfrontness of my personality scares men away. "Whaaaat???" I said. "That's NOT what the statistics of my dating track record would say." (lol!!) What I know for sure now is that when a guy is secure in who he is, the "upfrontness" of my personality doesn't scare him at all. On the contrary, it appears to bring him in and makes him feel comfortable. ;)

Angela Smith
Angela Smith

Great article. Being an introvert is very different to being shy. however, lots of introvert children learn to become shy because other children make them wrong for being quite. And that sense of social disapproval leads to shyness. Once a person starts to truly accept their introversion and that is okay to be quite - it makes it easier to tackle the shyness.

Donnae
Donnae

Saying to those I conversate with, "I am really shy. " This usually caused them to push me into talking a bit more until I am comfortable

Cheryl King
Cheryl King

Seiji NotHere... I know he maybe coming from a dating point of view, however, I think this may help you too. Since you talk to bands, and will be doing work in the public.

Nicole Colon
Nicole Colon

I've been mistakenly placed in the "shy" category my entire life. I'm not shy. Just reserved, observant and cautious. You learn so much more when you quietly sit back and watch. I don't think there is anything wrong with not wanting to be the center of attention.

Ruth Florella Charlton
Ruth Florella Charlton

Not shy at all. But I am over lame approaches or dudes thinking because I smile, I'm easy. How did being happy equate to that?? If someone can please get it through to the low self esteem girls to please love yourself more, then men won't think I"m being extra when I have a standard. "Can I come over?" No I just met you. You want to come by my place? No, I just met you. Can we just hang out?? No, I'm not your buddy, I want a real date. Can we just be fwb. No, no looking to be used. Dang girl you got too many rules. No, I HAVE RESPECT FOR MYSELF. ugh!! Yes, Paul Carrick Brunson I know that's not what you asked but I'm just saying.

Jennifer M. Crowley
Jennifer M. Crowley

I Telly. Liners to read engaging articles about everything they can possibly get their hands on. Trivia games are the best.

Jennifer M. Crowley
Jennifer M. Crowley

Great post Paul. That's what I hear most from my clients. Unfortunately we have overused the social media gadgets to stay connected as a way to deflect from truly conversing face to face.

Karen Haskins
Karen Haskins

Claudine Reid Letts...im just a year behind you and have been shy pretty much since childhood. You rarely see good reads on the topic. This was nice to see.

NynyPooh
NynyPooh

Yes there actually is; I can testify :)